Limbo, that uncomfortable feeling of being between where you are now, and where you'll be soon. An awful feeling, an unhappy feeling, a depressing feeling... and i'm stuck there. I know what yesterday looked like, and I know what today feels like, but I can't even comprehend tomorrow.
I've lost count of the amount of times i've been in this mind set, and though every time I overcome my feeling of uselessness, it doesn't make the next time easier. Every time seems to be a stronger sense of emptiness, and a more dramatic situation that got me there. It's dis heartening, to know that all of the times I have tried, and tried, and tried to make myself better, has all lead me back to the same hopeless feeling. Around and around in circles, but each time around, the circle gets bigger, spiralling out of control.
This time, nothing seems okay. Nothing makes me smile, nothing motivates me, nothing makes me care, nothing brings out that person I know I am inside, and some days I forget who that is, almost convinced she was never there. All of this, because I am stuck in a state of limbo, because life has put me in such a position that I can't find my way out. I feel like i'm in the labyrinth, frightened at every turn, losing hope with every step I take.
I am writing this for my own satisfaction. For years I have wanted to start a blog, to write, and to inspire. Two out of three is enough for now, I hope to turn this depression into inspiration sometime soon.
All my love and sincerity,
Mikayla Katherine
