A Moment in Time

The past few months really have been life changing for me, my outlook on life is completely different to what it was this time last year. This time last year I had very little self worth, no motivation, no drive, I thought that what other people thought of me defined who I was - and now sitting here, I know I couldn't have been more wrong.

This beautiful baby girl growing in me has opened my eyes to the world, to this absolutely, stunningly beautiful journey we are all on - each of our journeys different. At 19 people would expect me to be at uni, to know what career path I want to take, to be "experiencing life" by partying etc. At 19 people's expectations no longer have a hold on me. At 19 I am proud to say that what I wanna be when I grow up, is a MUM to this beautiful child I already have depending on me, and I intend to be as amazing at that job as I can be.

This baby has done so much more for me already, than she will ever know. She pulled me out of depression and motivated me. I now know my worth, and everyday I have more and more drive to be the person I want to be. At 19 people say this baby will ruin my life. At 19, I say this baby has already, MADE my life. As I said - everyone's journey is different, and this is mine. 

This time last year I had so much anger inside me, I hated myself and resented the people around me. Now I look around me and see amazing people, people I wouldn't be here without. Nothing brings me more joy than spending time with my family, especially the children in my family, looking at them and knowing they will be there for my little girl, and help her to be stronger than I ever could be. There really is something so amazing about children, their innocence, their confidence. They haven't been corrupted by the bad things in life yet, and their is so much beauty in that.

When I started writing this blogpost, my intention was to write about "family", but now I realise what I wanted to write about, was time. Time never stops, these children who are our babies, will soon enough be our age, making their own mistakes and (hopefully) learning from them. Everything changes, yet we move through our life's so fast, we forget to stop and appreciate every moment. When was the last time you stopped, and really took in the life around you? I know for me it wasn't until recently, that I started doing this, my belly is growing so fast i've barely had time to catch my breath. Time waits for no man, and isn't it funny how the older we get, the more we want to slow down? I remember in primary school I couldn't WAIT to go to high school, and then in high school I wanted nothing more than to get out of there, now I find myself wanting to meet my baby already, while at the same time wanting each day to be twice as long, so I have more moments to enjoy. And then somehow, primary school still feels like yesterday.

I don't really know WHY I wanted to write this, I guess I just wanted to encourage you to take a moment today - what are you grateful for in this moment? For me it's a family that supports me, regardless of the mistakes i've made. What about you?

Thank you for taking the time to read, I hope you got something out of it - if not, I hope it was at least enjoyable to read :-)

Until next time!

All my love,

Mikayla xx

Relaxing Amongst The Chaos

As i'm sure you know, life can get REAL busy sometimes, and whether it be physically or mentally, it just gets a bit much! I'm 25 weeks pregnant at the moment and boy has that time flown. From the moment I found out, to this moment right now typing on my keyboard, everything has just been FULL on! I know that's to be expected when you're preparing yourself for a baby human, but even so - it doesn't make it any easier to handle.

I reached a point where I shut down, couldn't deal with any human interaction outside of my home because my mind was just SO busy and I was finding it difficult to deal with that on top of life around me. I was incredibly anxious, and then I was worried about baby and if she was okay inside such a stressed out body, making myself MORE anxious and just all around I was in a very bad head space.

After about a month of being "down in the dumps" with a busy mind, and trying not to leave the house, something clicked and I realised I had to get my act together for baby's sake, and find a way to deal with all the things running through my head! I heard of a book called "Calm", that a much loved YouTuber Tanya Burr talked about in one of her videos, and "calm" is exactly what I needed to be, so I went out and purchased this book. It talks about loads of things but the one I really liked the idea of was having a bath. Funnily enough this was a semi foreign concept to me as in our home we had a HUGE bath, and a limited water supply, meaning we couldn't actually fill it (lol), so I never really had the chance. Luckily, my mum had been wanting a new bath for a LONG time as it helps her back, and just my luck she decided right when I needed it to get one. It took a while to install but the moment it was plumbed up I was THERE. Literally as soon as it was plumbed up...

As you can see the bathroom was still unfinished, but I thought it was quite nice to be able to relax amongst all the clutter going on, it felt quite appropriate!

I used the St. Ives, Apricot Scrub, which I have been loving! It has really helped my hormonal skin stay half py normal! I still get spots but significantly less than I was getting before I started using it!
I also used my favourite scrub - Smoothie Star Breakfast Scrub all over my body and boy does that stuff smell amazing. I can't really describe it, it's very, very sweet... a sort of caramel sweetness. It also leaves your body feeling super soft and hydrated!

And then to make the bath that little bit more special, I added in the Xmas Kisses bath bomb by LUSH (excuse the manky nails), which has a cinnamon scent to it, quite lovely to go with all the sweet smelling products I used!

It was nice to just lay there and RELAX, not having to do anything, talk to anyone or listen to anyones arguments. Just me, the sound of the wind outside, the renovation equipment and the yummy smells filling my senses. I found it was a really great place to meditate and think about things without any anxiety. It really, truly helped me a lot and has now become a weekly routine for Sunday nights, the perfect way to wind down at the end of the week. I find myself to be calm a lot of the time now, and find it easier to carry out every day tasks because I set that time aside for MYSELF to relax, and just really enjoy the little things.

What's something you do to relax yourself when life gets a bit too much? I'd love to know, comment below!

Thanks for reading, and we will talk soon!

Lots of love,
Mikayla xx

On another note, the bathroom is close to finished now! Only the floor left to complete (as you can see).